Saturday, February 28, 2009

Glastonbury 2009

Yes, it's official. The Gents are to play Glastonbury 2009.

As Noel Coward said, on receiving the news that he was to be knighted, 'Not before time. Not before time.'

The Gents have always abhorred ostentation of any kind, and so we've turned down the Pyramid Stage in favour of a more modest venue, a bandstand I believe, somewhere near the cider bus. That should suit us very well. Word travels quickly, however, especially amongst the young, and already the hot ticket of the festival looks like being 'The Gents at the Cider Dome'.

Cider's actually quite a strong drink, my dears, and requires some respect. An incautious approach can lead to all sorts of regrettable behaviour - unseemly removal of apparel, rowdy squealing and the like. We'll have none of that, thank you.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009


I know. It's been three weeks since I posted anything here. I haven't been away doing book tours or bob-sleighing in Biarritz or anything interesting like that. I've been here all along, sitting in front of my laptop, wandering the second circle of hell known as edits.

It's not easy. You come to the end of a project, tell yourself that it's ready to go, apart from a few minor tweaks, and start on the final edits. Those minor tweaks turn into major re-writes, and before you know it you're producing what amounts to a different book entirely. Your original deadline becomes a date in history, somewhere on a timeline with the Tudors. This is embarrassing, both professionally and financially. Your publisher takes you out to lunch and tells you to stop worrying, you're great, and your fifteen-year-old bank manager seems equally smiley and unconcerned.

But you're a writer, and you know the truth. Any day now gangsta people are going to come round and cut you.

Sunday, February 01, 2009

Wish you were here?

Me too. Here's a ray of sunshine for a bleak February morning. Shake those maraccas!